I remember being pregnant with Cort and thinking I was more than ready for motherhood. After all I had all the clothes and gear I would need. I had been babysitting and taking care of kids since I was 9, so I knew how to take care of a baby. I was so excited and I already loved him. I was ready.
I was wrong. I had thought I loved that tiny babe in my womb, but the moment he was placed in my arms I knew I had never loved anyone that much.
I wasn't prepared for the fact that once you're a mom you are a mom 24/7. If you're child needs you it doesn't matter if it's the middle of the night or if you're in the bathroom.
It was an adjustment, that's for sure! But I wouldn't go back...EVER!
Being a mom is hard, and not always fun. For example yesterday we went ice fishing. The boys had a blast...but I would be lying if I told you they never once complained about being bored, and never fought over the fishing poles.
After fishing we headed to the outlets in Park city. At first the ride was nice, Cash was asleep and all was peaceful. Then Cort threw up. Of course we weren't really prepared. So we got to live with the smell and mess. We did stop at Walmart and bought him new clothes and some towels to clean the car as best as we could.
The rest of the day was fine. We ate lunch and let the boys play on the play place at Dell taco. Found some baby clothes and enjoyed being together.
For some reason I woke up about one in the morning. I went to check on my babies sleeping only to discover Cort had thrown up again. He sleeps on the top bunk....just imagine the fun that was to clean up (remember I am about 8 months pregnant)!
Not only did I get to clean up a mess in the middle of the night, but I now worried about my child. I couldn't really fall asleep because I was worried he'd throw up again.
I definitely wasn't prepared for the worry that comes as a mom. I think sometimes there must be something wrong with me because I worry over the tiniest thing. If my kids are sick, I worry. If they are sad I worry. If they are tired or whiny, I worry.
I hate to see my kids sick or unhappy. I know that everyone gets sick and everyone has challenges, but I love my boys so much it's hard to see them suffer.
I am not the best at writing in my journal, or blogging for that matter! But I hope to do better, because I never want to forget the funny things my boys do or say. I truly cherish every moment being a mom.
I am nervous about having three kids soon. But I am also dying to meet this little girl. I am so thankful that I was blessed to be a mom.
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